It's Like The Clouds Have Parted.

... And God came down, and said:
DUH.


This book has changed my life, no lies.


Seriously.
How many hours, days even, has any one given girl spent justifying, making up excuses for why a guy didn't call her, didn't come over, doesn't want to meet the family? It's because
He's JUST NOT INTO ME.

It's not that he's tortured, he can be as 'damaged' as he wants.
If he's interested, he's going to act like it.
If he's not, then why on earth would I waste my time?

WHY DID SOMEONE NOT GIVE ME THIS BOOK MY FRESHMAN YEAR?!?!?!

Anyways, I just wanted to let everyone know, if you're female, BUY THIS BOOK. I'm borrowing the one I'm reading, but I WILL actually buy my own copy.
Which is a big deal for me; I usually don't buy books, I just borrow them.
But seriously, it's like I've been so blind my whole life...

I mean, I am awesome. And I deserve to spend my time/effort on someone who's going to spend the same amount of time/effort on me that I am him.
And 'it's better than nothing' is NOT good enough anymore.

Whoo girl power!!!

:]

Do One Thing Everyday That Scares You.

Check, and check.

Seriously though, I LOVE it!! New haircut brings more joy than new shoes... Almost. But I got a pair of those a while back, too.

So, this song has been stuck in my hair ALL DAY:
I know this pretty rave girl
always thinkin' 'bout her
and when she says hi to me
butterfly's go right through me
and when I see her dancin'
wanna take a chance in
getting a little closer
and maybe get to know her

Makes me want to go to a dance and bust a move.

Everyday Should Be A Holiday.

And it was... But this was a special holiday.

This is the first Valentine's Day, I think of my entire life, that I thoroughly enjoyed.
After putting around Jerome, we drove down to Prescott... It was kinda a bust, but it was really fun to just walk around and see all the little shops and the clock tower where Back To The Future was filmed... Neato. We ended up getting bored and leaving early, though, which was the BEST choice EVER.

We drove down to Anthem, to Amy's house, and picked up strawberries and chocolate, then threw on our swim suits and headed for the HOT TUB!
Miss Amy turned in after a while, but Shay and I stayed up until around 1 AM, just talking and giggling and venting and confiding... It was amazing. I was able to let loose about so many things that I haven't been able to tell ANYONE about... And I love it. It was so cleansing, ya know?
So that was my V-Day, the next day we had a blast making goodies, taking naps, then meeting up with Dad and getting all dolled up and going out to dinner, then we came back and watched 'Tool Academy'... Can I just tell you how freaking funny that show is? It makes me want a boyfriend just so I can put him on there. 'course, I don't think I'd ever EVER date anyone like those guys...
Um. I guess I should say I won't ever EVER date anyone like that again. Ha.



Woke up Monday, met up with Mom and went shopping.
Oh Ross, oh Ross, wherefore art thou Ross?
I got an adorable blue trench coat, and bought my sexy librarian shoes! Hurray! I've wanted a pair forEVER, and these were only TEN BUCKS! Yay and a half.
Also, I got Lord of the Rings: Two Towers: Extended Edition for... Drumroll please...
FOUR DOLLARS AND NINTEY NINE CENTS.
Yes, I'm awesome.
I know.

Then drove home, dropped Shay off, and got home.

All in all, this has been such an amazing weekend. Thanks a bizillion to Shay and Amy, and Dad, who all made it possible.

On A More Somber Note...

I'll get back to my amazing weekend in a bit, but I just wanted to let everyone know that Sunday, February 15th, my great grandpa Bob Hanna passed away. He's been ready to go for some time, years even. But he's been a big part of my life, especially since I moved to Arizona. He's Dad's grandpa, and lived in Gilbert for years and years, but he's being buried in Pittsburgh, where he spent most of his life.
He was a member of the Pittsburgh Fire Department, and his house reflected it... He had hoses and hats and little fire trucks all over. That and everyone's favorite cookie jar: It was a little fireman, and it yelled at you when you opened it up to take a cookie.
I blogged about him back in June, we weren't sure if he would make it much past then. But he survived the holidays, which is what he really wanted.
Grandpa Bob always took a real interest in me, and he always asked the important stuff: How's school, how's the weather, and how rich is your boyfriend. He told me all the time 'Don't you give your heart away until you've checked out his bank account first. It don't matter if he's good lookin, you can't pay the bills on good lookin.'
Unfortunately, I never really had anyone to tell him about, rich or otherwise... Probably because I always seem to end up in the valley right after a break up. [Really, that's when I need it the most, but still.]
Anyways, I just wanted to say that I love Grandpa Bob, and I'm glad he's out of pain, and we'll miss him something fierce.

There Are No Words.

This last weekend has been such an incredible healing experience.
I truly cannot put into words how good it has been for me. But I can tell you everything that happened, and I can show you the 300 odd pictures we took. :]

Around two on Friday, Amy got to my place and we started the 3 hour drive to Jerome, up switchbacks and at the very tip top of a mountain. It, literally, it at the top of the world. It was twisty, turny, and all around stomach turning... But so incredibly worth it. We finally started seeing little... Cottages, almost, brightly colored, and old fashioned cars, and people with dreadlocks that looked like they had taken a wrong turn at Woodstock, and Shay knew she had found her Nirvana.
We found our bed and breakfast, The Surgeon's House. The story is that back in the day, the 1800's, there was a hospital and something happened and now it's all haunted, well this is the doctor's house. But it was the farthest thing from pristine or surgical. The owner, Andrea, greeted us with big hugs and showed us around her beautiful house, and made sure we knew that Mother Earth was looking after all her fishes, and that fairies lived in the gardens.
I have never known something to be truer.
That night we ate dinner at the Haunted Hamburger and got -what else?- daiquiris. Then we went into Amy's room, and did a cute little photo shoot in some of the hold decorations, nightgowns and such, and just stayed up and giggled. It was silly and wonderful... Exactly what the doctor ordered. I know it sounds silly, but somehow, being up there at the top of that mountain, waking up to a wall painted like the sea, eating a fantastic [all vegetarian] breakfast, and being there with Miss Amy, who is one of the coolest, least judgemental people I know... I felt so safe. Like nothing could reach me, no heartache or stress or pain could find me here in this purple room overlooking a fairy garden.
Next day we shopped around Jerome, which was absolutely a blast. My favorite part was the House of Joy... An old whorehouse converted into a cute little shop, where I bought these totally cool 1950's cat eye sunglasses.

Samthecomputer is being lame, so I'm gonna have to cut short this one... But Jerome: Part Duex is coming very son to a blogspot near you!

*is in hysterics*

Why life is wonderful:

-Amy had to leave, but they hired back a lady who used to work here, so I don't have to totally stress! Yay!

- http://anteka.livejournal.com *snorts* laugh, laugh, laugh at this Supernatural spoof. Love Plastic!Winchester Theater.

-Hanging with Kara for a little bit today... Not as much as I would've liked, but it was somethin. I freakin miss that girl!

-Speaking of missing... Ms. Abel. Miss her more than life. How on God's green earth am I going to survive next year? *is in not good hysterics* But next week, lady... You+MeXThe Coupling=WONDERFUL!

-Parent teacher conferences went wonderfully... As & Bs in all my classes!

-"Human beings are funny. They long to be with the person they love but refuse to admit openly. Some are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear. Fear that their feelings may not be recognized, or even worst, returned. But one thing about human beings puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be connected with the object of their affection even if it kills them slowly within."
-Sigmund Freud

-finallyseeing.tumblr.com

-Tomorrow is the big day! Amy, Shay and I are taking off, kids. I'm going to spend all tonight repacking, and repacking again... I want to have the perfect outfits for the perfect weekend. I cannot wait. To get out, to get away, and to come home and be less stressed.

-Tonight is Supernatural night at Tea's! Yayz!

-So, get this. Tea, Bee and I are throwing a superhero couples party! Where everyone is assigned a superhero to dress up as, and we go, and it's amazing. I got Spiderman and MJ, which on one hand made me SO HAPPY [see promises blog, and also my kissing list] and on the other hand, I'm wondering how exactly I got the short end of this stick? I mean, Not only is he a total whiner, but Spiderman SOLD HIS MARRIAGE to MJ to SATAN. I'm not exaggerating, I read it in a Cracked article [which automatically means it's true?] But it should still be cool. So if anyone knows where I can get me some webslinging action... Hook a girl up. =]

I've Never Been There, But I Know The Way...

This is my music these days... If I could find more Stephen Ashbrook, I'd put it up... Seriously guys, check him out.
If I could have one song to be a boyfriend, it would be his song 'Lullaby'... I'll get the lyrics when I'm with Miss Amy next.
So, like, THIS WEEKEND!!! ^.^

Today the other Amy, the one who's The Doc's receptionist, told us she's putting in her week notice. Her husband has dropped his basket [worse than I EVER did] and is moving away. So yours truly is going to be running the show... Yeah, prayers would be nice right about now.

Emilee, aka Lillith, made a chart in her Primary class this week, where she wrote down the names of everyone in her family, and a short description. For example, she wrote 'Mom: loves us the most.', 'Dad: hard worker.' and 'Sadie: pretty voice'.
Then she added in 'Cass: hugs and kisses boys.'
Good to know that's what my little sister is going to remember about me. ;]

In closing, I'd just like to do my new favorite thing:

List of Things That Make Me Happy:
rainy days. warm fuzzy blankets. having samthecomputer back. lyrics of songs that i can relate to. getting back old friends. beating clickomania. hot chocolate. pictures, as par the course. compliments, giving and getting. dresses with colored tights. ellipses.

Every Little Girl Is A Princess

I'm in love with this picture... Why exactly is that not me?

So, I have a new favorite song... 'A Walk Through Hell' by Say Anything. It goes with my other new favorite song, 'I Want To Know Your Plans' by the same. But the lyrics go: I'd walk through hell for you, let it burn right through my shoes, these soles are useless without you, walk through hell for you, let the torturing ensue, this soul is useless without you.

First, this is TOTALLY the Dean song.
Secondly, it's a little strange I should like it as much as I do, as I've yet to meet a boy who I would burn my shoes for.

Great Blogs of Fire!

"You know when you’re sitting on a chair and you lean back so you’re just on two legs then you lean too far and you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time."
-Stephen Wright

First off... Holy crap, kids.
Can I just suggest something? If we want to say something to someone, just say it. Don't blog it... It opens you up to critizism.

Freakin drama-rama... Can't we all just get along?

Next.
I am more excited for next weekend than I can put into words. Shay, Amy and I are going to Jerome for the weekend. Just got this email from Miss Amy:
"Hey all is set for Jerome.
Bring something fancy for Sunday.
We are going to do one of our fun nights out.
You know... we are the only ones dressed up in a not so dressy place
Just because we can.
We'll have to come up with a silly reason in case asked.
Past reason #1 "just got released from prison"
Possible reason this time "It's my cats birthday""
BAM!!! Yay.
Expect approximately a BAZILLION pictures.

Next.
Sorry I seem to be on a blog a week spin... The 'rents took my computer away. HISSSS.

Next.
I am just now realizing how FRACKIN much I have to do before I leave. Things I need to teach, things I need to learn, pictures I need to take, people I need to be friends with, to-do lists I need to cross off. Relationships I need to fix.

Next.
“The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do. ”

Next:
BAM. Heather and I are going to Morp. Guess this means we're friends again?
Oh, and guess what else? We're gonna wear my 'Nerdy' shirt. [She'll get her own, we're not both gonna... wear... one...]

Next:
"Your emotions could pull you all over the map today, Cancer, making it difficult to know exactly what to do. One moment you are ready to cash in your chips and walk away from what you have already gained. The next moment you are hard at work trying to figure out how to save everything. Although it might seem as if your decisions now are all-or-nothing, the truth is that there's a lot of middle ground for you to explore." Oh, hey thanks.


Next:
Love you. Miss you.
You too.