The Part Of The Game Where Miss Cass Astounds You All...

With what a nice little Holly Homemaker she'll make someone someday.

-Put your orange/lemon peels down the food/garbage disposal... It will make your sink and kitchen smell wonderful and citrus-y.
-Witch Hazel... I swear by it. It evens out your skin, gets rid of zits, and probably would even solve world hunger if given the chance.
-Whiteboard markers write on, and wipe off, mirrors, making it easy to write notes where you'll see them easily.
- Washing clothes inside out will help them hold their color, and have less chance of bleeding or fading.
-Rice/corn bags work as amazing heating/cooling pads... And are totally organic, too!
-Best way to get rid of morning sickness? Saltines. No lie. Eat a little bit of carbs before you get moving around, and your stomach will settle.
-Don't box dye your hair... Just don't do it.
-Changing your shampoo every, oh, three or four months will keep your hair shiny and rotate what nutrients are going into your hair, and make it shiner and better looking. :]





Okay, I know this is a crap post... Don't care. I haven't anything worth writing, and that's enough of a tragedy that I think I'll carry it on my own, thanks.

Also, I'm kinda waiting for a kiss like this...



And for Monday's Gossip Girl! Looks crazy stylish. ^.^

A Novel Without A Hero.

And with this, and a profound bow to his patrons, the Manager retires, and the curtain rises.
Vanity Fair.
I LOVE THIS BOOK.
It's incredible. I used to watch the 6 hour BBC version every summer, but it wasn't until I opened the book, and read the 'Before the Curtain' until I realized exactly what it meant.
I thought it was vanity because one is beautiful. But it's not... It's a fair! Like a carnival... It's an observation of human frailities, everything that we so mindlessly put on parade. But when we really stop to look at what it is we're doing... It's absurd! What we are willing to put ourselves through to be accepted in society, or even more so to conquer. And it asks the eternal question so few are willing to answer, or even acknowledge:
Which of us is happy in this world? Which of us has his desire? Or, having it, is satisfied?

A Truth.

Not Anymore.

I need to giggle more. And smile more, and flirt more, and wear heels and dresses more.
Exactly what I want to do.

Look at how much time I've already missed! There's so much to be done! So many people to meet, smiles to give and receive, books to read, love to fall into.

What am I waiting for???

Cheery.

So, I figured out why I'm kinda grouchy lately...
I am not who I want to be. I'm not living the life I want. And that's not anyone's fault but my own.
For a long time, it was because I didn't know what I wanted.
Then it was because I wasn't brave enough to take it. I didn't want to... Rock the boat, as it were.
Well, that's done.

I want to be old fashioned, timeless. Glamorous. I want lace and pastels.



I want to live my life in soft focus.
Reality is great, sure.
Not.
I don't have long before I do have to go to real life, to grow up. But for now...

Roman Holiday, here I come.


By the way, I've done major house cleaning...
Anyone want any shoes/clothes/accessories?

They Told Me To Tell You To Hold On.

My New New Year's Resolution:

Let Go.

Of my anger, my disappointment.
Inhibitions.
Emotional baggage.
Expectations.


I really wish I had something worth blogging about... My life has really kinda become rather monotonous. School, sometimes friends, home, dinner, homework, brush teeth, wash face, and wait for sleep to take me.


A friend of mine once told me about an idea for a movie short:
A man goes through his day [a lot like the one I just described] and goes to bed at night. The next day he does the same, but before he gets in bed he shoots himself in the head. The next day, he wakes up and goes through the same process.
Because his life was his hell.

I'm not saying my life is hell, not anything close. Just... I feel like I'm at a plateau in my life.
And that's terrifying.

I need to take Tara's advice, and...


Be the person I want to be.

My Miracles.

Today, I am thankful for the little miracles that saved the day.

1. I woke up holding two teddy bears.
2. I am on at least joking terms with someone I swore up and down I'd never look at again. If being able to make 'that's what she said' jokes are as much of a friendship as we'll ever have again, I'm okay with that.
3. Dean's out of hell! Yay!
4. I think my best-est friend and I are back in the game... Together.
5. Those delicious little Nerd covered jelly beans.
6. Shay and I planned our escape... Jerome, here we come!
7. The lady who was supposed to cut my hair never showed... This is a good thing; I'm in no emotional state to do anything with my hair at the moment.
8. I got my ACT scores back... I got a 25? Which I guess is pretty good? I got a 32 in reading... Which is way good. ^.^
9. My little sister's singing and playing a song that I think she wrote for me. Which fulfills a requirement on my Bucket List.
10. I caught up with an old friend today, and it was more of a miracle than I ever thought possible.

More to come, I'm sure.
Thank you.
:]

This Is...

The first day of the rest of my life.
The beginning of the end.
In the hour I have before school starts, this is the calm before the storm.

I'm only mildly freaking out.

:D

This Must Be It, Welcome To The New Year...

So, I don't know about you all, but New Cassidi is confusing the heck out of me. :]
Change is hard, especially when you're the one doing the changing.
I think I like new Cass, but I'm still in the process of getting to know her.
I'm quieter, that's for sure.
I cares more in a lot of ways, and less in others.
I'm mostly more independent, in the sense that I'm willing to let go of lots of things. [She's not sure how she feels about this yet.]
I want to try harder to be a better person, like to work harder, be more... Accomplished? I started playing the piano again, and reading.
I'm more content to take a supporting role in groups, I don't feel the need to be the center of attention all the time. I think this means I'm less insecure, ya know? Like, I don't need to be constantly reminded that I'm good.
I play by the rules... For the most part. ;)

So many things are happening that make this all seem... Surreal, almost. I can't tell you exactly when everything started happening... I guess when things all fell apart, they had to put themselves back together, and this just happens to be the way things are rebuilding themselves.
I'm way unsettled tonight, sorry if it sounds like just a downer post... I just need to get back home, and need to try to work a lot of things out. In the last couple of days a few things have happened that need to be taken care of. I need to get over my confrontational issues and just go for it, right?

Haylee keeps saying that the only thing to be afraid of is being too afraid of doing anything at all. Well, that's true I'm sure, but sometimes it's so hard to not just put things neatly away in mental drawers and shut them, to put things away for later... Let them fester until it's too much to handle. I really should be better at that, at not being in denial.
But seriously, what do I have to be in denial about? No one has to tell me I have a pretty fantastic life. Sure, I have problems, but who doesn't? For every single problem I have, I personally know someone else who's got a similar problem, only worse. Well, almost every problem.
Blah. Now I'm just ranting about silly things.
I feel unsettled.
And I don't like going to sleep without a little bit of sugar before bed. ;D

But oh well, right? I'll have to deal with reality soon enough, I might as well enjoy my last day of break, right?

I'm in the valley, and I just saw Lion King! That was AMAZING. The costumes, the actors, the dances... I will never look at 'Can You Feel The Love Tonight' the same. I'll post pictures as soon as I get them, probably when I get home.