Lackluster, Man.

Dear Ms. Abel:
I miss *you.
*See: Supernatural.

I found this picture of all three Winchester boys, and OH EM GEE, guys. I just want Jared to be my big brother, Jensen to be my crying buddy,and Jeffery to be my boyfriend. Also, life partner.

Practice yesterday really, really was bad. I went to practice in the BEST mood because I was in Ms. Abel's room watching my J Cubed, and I came to practice a little late. Naturally, I walked in right as we started the "pep talk". No lie, that was pretty much a whole lot of negative energy... And if that's coming from ME, you know it's a downer.
Then we all wrote down all the problems we had with the play 'anonymously' and Heather read them out loud. It's not like everyone doesn't already know which one I had:
We don't love each other. There's no bonding. All the faith in the play in the world won't do any good if we don't have faith in each other.
Other people wrote that we didn't pay attention,we don't care... Someone said it was all my fault.[I'm looking at you, Levi.] And Blake made a T-chart: My problem is, as par the course, Tucker. [When you figure out how to help that, Blake, you let me know.]
Mr. Willard went around and told us all what he liked about us to get the juju back up to something decent... Blake is focused, oZ is emotional, Marcia is a treat... And I have high moral standards. Coming from Mr. Willard is probably the most meaningful thing he could've said, but... I felt like I needed more, you know? Like, I've been in the drama program for all four years of my high school life, and I really feel like I've put my blood, sweat, and LOTS of tears into the plays I've been involved with, and all he could say was that I have high standards.
Anyways, it was kinda rough. But I LOVED that Shay and Kara were there... I think it was really good for me to hear that Shay, who's the only other person still around that has been around nearly as long as I have, and she saw the same problems with it that I do. I needed that.

Then practice was over, and Blake drove us all home... He took me to Mutual last, and just let me cry. I needed to let it all out [again] and I feel so much better since then. He just listened. As much as I love jumping on the Blake Bandwagon, it actually was really good for me. It was nice to not have someone say 'Suck it up, get over it' which is pretty much what I've been hearing since... Labor Day. So I really do feel better, about the play, about my sweetheart, and about... Life in general.

I miss Ms. Abel. And Supernatural. And writing letters.
Really I should be less self centered. I'm working on it... I'm going to start service projects, I decided. =]